[Another OkCupid adventure.  Please note the time stamps, which jump around a bit for clarity's sake.  As far as I was concerned we had a perfectly pleasant exchange, agreed to meet at a certain place at a certain time, and then out of the blue he canceled.

If he just canceled without the "virtual communication style" lameness I'd've been more than fine.  I called him on his bullshit and he became insulting (though it could certainly be argued that my characterization of him as "weak" was the first blow).

This is the entirety of our communication so I am still confounded.  By the way, I'm out of printer paper so I did not bother printing up his message and shoving it up my fat ass.]

(9:43:31 am)FromOCtoSF:hey there

(9:46:43 am)FromOCtoSF:I would love to buy you a drink

(9:46:53 am)FromOCtoSF:what neighborhood do you live in?

(9:48:12 am)ShazamSF:The Mission.

(9:48:23 am)FromOCtoSF:when were you thinking?

(9:49:10 am)ShazamSF:Tomorrow during the day or next week, the time of which I cannot now tell you since I don’t have my work schedule yet.

(9:50:22 am)FromOCtoSF:I am out of town next week, but can meet in the later afternoon tomorrow, wahts your name?

(9:51:12 am)ShazamSF:Depends on how late in the afternoon.

(9:51:35 am)FromOCtoSF:4pm

(9:51:53 am)ShazamSF:That might work. Where?

(9:52:07 am)FromOCtoSF:daves on 3rd?

(9:56:31 am)ShazamSF:ok

(9:56:49 am)FromOCtoSF:whats your name?

(9:58:05 am)ShazamSF:You seem to think that’s important. Suzanne.

(9:58:31 am)FromOCtoSF:HI Suzanne, I’m Sean, and yes I think a lot

(9:59:02 am)ShazamSF:So I’ll see you tomorrow. Out front?

(9:59:30 am)FromOCtoSF:sure, I would love to. you know where it is?

(9:59:43 am)ShazamSF:Yeah, I’ve been there once before.

(9:59:51 am)ShazamSF:I think.

(10:00:02 am)FromOCtoSF:its between Market and Mission on 3rd

(10:00:35 am)ShazamSF:Across from one of the many Westins, right?

(10:00:46 am)FromOCtoSF:right

(10:04:01 am)FromOCtoSF:that was easy, you seem amiable enough

(10:08:19 am)ShazamSF:Are most people that try online “dating” sites assholes?

(10:08:30 am)ShazamSF:Why would I sign up if I didn’t want to meet people?

(10:10:08 am)FromOCtoSF:great point

(10:11:10 am)FromOCtoSF:have you met a lot of people from OKC?

(10:14:24 am)ShazamSF:Four: http://randomrimjobs.com/2009/12/02/okcupid-not-greatcupid/

(10:17:48 am)FromOCtoSF:oh my god you may be perfect

(10:19:23 am)ShazamSF:I wish.

(10:20:06 am)ShazamSF:Damn, now I can only disappoint you.

(10:20:35 am)FromOCtoSF:nope, I think we will get along just fine

(10:22:56 am)ShazamSF:Keeping my fingers crossed.

(10:23:00 am)ShazamSF:See you tomorrow.

(10:24:43 am)FromOCtoSF:are you leaving?

(10:27:57 am)FromOCtoSF:I could read your blog all day, but you better change my name in it

ShazamSF:  Unless their names are extremely common (i.e. Michael) or they’re no longer in my life I give my guys nicknames.

(2:04:13 pm)FromOCtoSF:youre too much, you know that?

(2:04:18 pm)FromOCtoSF:who reads your blog?

(2:04:41 pm)ShazamSF:Probably mostly people who follow me on Twitter.

(2:06:04 pm)FromOCtoSF:how many twitter people do you have following you?

(2:06:47 pm)ShazamSF:About 1700.

(2:06:58 pm)FromOCtoSF:LOL

(2:07:01 pm)FromOCtoSF:thats funny

(2:07:34 pm)ShazamSF:Why?

(2:07:46 pm)FromOCtoSF:cause I thought it would be like 200

(2:08:07 pm)ShazamSF:I don’t knwo if I should be insulted.

(2:08:11 pm)ShazamSF:know

(2:08:41 pm)FromOCtoSF:no, you shouldnt be. Im just not a big twitter guy, so I assume it would be something like facebook

(2:10:02 pm)ShazamSF:Huh?

(2:10:21 pm)ShazamSF:You’ve never used Twitter so you think it’s the same as Facebook?

(2:19:12 pm)FromOCtoSF:I just guessed that you wouldnt have a bunch of people following you if you werent directly and regularly connected to them

(11:24 pm)ShazamSF:  You must not understand how Twitter works. And you’re judging me based on the number of Twitter followers I have?!

(8:02 am)FromOCtoSF:  I dont judge, it wasnt a judgement it was my lack of understanding.

You have some real probelms.

(10:09 am)ShazamSF:  Still confused as to how you can determine that I have problems considering you’ve never met me and don’t want to do so.

Please, oh wise one, tell me how to make myself better so that I may please you.

(2:20 pm)FromOCtoSF: Hi Suzanne,

I think I am going to cancel tomorrow. I dont think the way we communicate virtually is laying the groundwork for a good personal interaction, so I am going to say good luck to you and be well.

Take care,


(11:17 pm)ShazamSF:  Thanks for letting me know.

But I’m not really sure what the fuck you are talking about. I don’t need a lame-ass excuse – you could have just canceled.

I think (and I really don’t need you to confirm or deny this) you read my blog and got freaked the fuck out for some reason. That’s fine. The weak are not my type.

(8:01 am)FromOCtoSF:  Actually no, your blog was actually pretty hot, it wasnt that at all, but from your response you are obviously lacking in any tact at all. You are abrupt, rude, crass (not in an endearing way), and matter of fact.

And while I dont mind whores, I don’t date bitches.

I find it particularly telling that I cancelled with an amount of kindness and the first thing you reply with is an insult. You know what, fuck you.

There is a difference between weak and discerning, but from the sound of your blog, you have no idea what discerning is so here is the definition:
to distinguish mentally; recognize as distinct or different; discriminate.

So why dont you print this email out, roll it up really tight, and shove it up your fat ass?

(10:07am)ShazamSF:  I’m not even sure between our IMs and messages (until this last one) when you think I was too matter-of-fact, which, by the way, cuts through the bullshit.

I believe you described me as “perfect” at one point.

But thanks for the material.

Post to Twitter Post to Delicious Post to Digg Post to Facebook Post to MySpace Post to StumbleUpon