We are currently in Gemini, the third sign of the Western Zodiac.  It runs roughly between May 21 and June 20.  Geminis are pretty cool people.  In the interest of full disclosure, I must say that I am a Gemini, which makes me pretty biased.  Not only am I a Gemini, but I get along very well with Geminis.  Some I get along with so well I fuck them.  I can think of only one Gemini with whom I did not get along, and I think that was more due to him having trouble with smart women with opinions of their own than our mutual sign.

Of course there are many famous Geminis.  Some are cool.  Some are not.  Some are meh.

Geminis who make me feel proud to share a sign with them:

  • Auberjonois, René (June 1):  Actor on “Benson.”  Need I say more?
  • Aung San Suu Kyi (June 19):  Burmese civil rights leader.
  • Baker, Josephine (June 3):  Entertainer and renouncer of American citizenship.
  • Barbeau, Adrienne (June 11):  Actress and owner of bodacious boobage.
  • Barris, Chuck (June 3):  Game show guy and unconfirmed secret spy.  Subject and co-writer of Confessions of a Dangerous Mind starring hottie Sam Rockwell.
  • Bening, Annette (May 29):  Actress in a damn good movie, American Beauty.
  • Biafra, Jello (June 17):  Lead “singer” of the Dead Kennedys, San Francisco punk band.
  • Blanc, Mel (May 30):  Who doesn’t love the Looney Tunes?  Oh, and MB was born in San Francisco and shares my birthday.
  • Burghoff, Gary (May 24):  Radar from “M*A*S*H*.”  Uh, Radar from “M*A*S*H*”!
  • Carey, Drew (May 23):  He’s pretty funny, though I’ve not seen him in “action” on “The New Price is Right.”
  • Cera, Michael (June 7):  Nerdy actor.  Anyone associated with “Arrested Development” is more than ok by me.  Very much looking forward to the movie.
  • Chabon, Michael (May 24):  Author of The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay, a Pulitzer Prize-winning book.  I’ve read it, and it’s good.  I read it back when I belonged to a book club.  The book club went from us reading and discussing books to us not reading and drinking wine.  I need to join another book club.
  • Church, Thomas Hayden (June 17):  Actor in “Ned and Stacy” and Sideways.
  • Collins, Joan (May 23):  Her character on “Dynasty” has inspired me to keep my former husband’s last name.  While I’m never getting married again, I love the idea of having a string of last names from all of my spouses.
  • Dahmer, Jeffrey (May 21):  What?  He was a really good serial killer.  He was really into men.
  • Depp, Johnny (June 9):  He’s hot and all, but his continued work with Tim Burton really makes me want to hurl.  I hate Tim Burton and all his stupid movies.  Yes, all of them.
  • Eastwood, Clint (May 31):  Clint is just damn cool.  However, I’m not too into the movies he’s been directing lately, and he was a real asshole to Sondra Locke (May 28) back in the day.  I know this due to a court decision I read in law school.  Sondra is also a Gemini.  I told you Geminis dig each other.  A lot.
  • Ebert, Roger (June 18):  While I don’t always agree with his reviews, he’s still the living film critic.
  • Edelstein, Lisa (May 21):  Inappropriately dressed hottie from “House M.D.” and object of lust of James Deen, whom I may dig even though I’ve never seen him in porn action.

Geminis.  I’m kind of neutral about these ones.

  • Abdul, Paula (June 19):  It’s kind of cool that she’s always blitzed out of her mind.
  • Atkins, Chet (June 20):  He’s some sort of athlete, right?  Nope, a musician.
  • Bakley, Bonny Lee (June 7):  “Famous” for being murdered by someone famous.
  • Bellow, Saul (June 10):  I guess he was an important writer.
  • Bleeth, Yasmine (June 14): I guess she used to be hot.
  • Boone, Pat (June 1):  Singer, right?
  • Bush, Barbara (June 8):  Her dog wrote a book.
  • Bush, George Herbert Walker (June 12):  Not as stupid as his son.
  • Campbell, Naomi (May 22):  She’s a model.  With a violent streak.  Which is kind of cool.
  • Carver, Raymond (May 25):  Writer.
  • Cassatt, Mary (May 22):  Painter.  I’m not particularly fond of her stuff, but I guess I’m supposed to like it.
  • Cousteau, Jacques-Yves (June 11):  Who doesn’t love the ocean?
  • Christo (June 13):  “Artist.”
  • Clooney, Rosemary (May 23):  George Clooney’s aunt.  I met George Clooney once.  Back before “ER” but after “Facts of Life.”  I’m not sure where “Roseanne” fits in there.  It was the early 90s.
  • Cox, Courteney (June 15):  Whatever.  She’s kind of annoying.
  • Cox, Nikki (June 2):   Seems to really like funny and funny-ish guys.
  • Curtis, Tony (June 3):  He was hot when he was younger.
  • Davis, Miles (May 26):   Everyone says he’s cool, but I really don’t like jazz.
  • Doyle, Arthur Conan (May 22):  He was knighted.  I never really got into Sherlock Holmes, but the latest movie was homoerotic, which I find very cool.
  • Dylan, Bob (May 24):  I know I’m supposed to like him, but I really don’t.  I’m even fucking a guy who’s photographed him, but I still can’t get into ol’ Bob.
  • Edwards, John (June 10 or 20, depending on the source):  Politician.  “Cheater.”  I put “cheater” in quotes because his wife may have agreed.  Why can’t more people be open about not being monogamous?
  • Emerson, Ralph Waldo (May 25):  Poet and shit.  I know I’m supposed to know and care about this guy, but I really don’t.

To be continued.

I swear.  True story.

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