Back when I used Craig’s List, I used it a lot. I both placed ads and responded to ads. One to which I responded was placed by a couple who wanted a lady to participate in threesomes with them. Actually, I responded to several such ads. This couple, however, I actually fucked.
The guy and I exchanged emails. He told me they were a professional couple. They all say they’re a “professional” couple. Frankly, I don’t give a shit what the people I fuck do for a living, but in the Online casual sex world “professional” seems to mean “not creepy.” Or at least that’s what it’s supposed to mean.
I don’t know if this couple was creepy per se, but I certainly didn’t see them do anything professional. In the emails I exchanged with the guy he said their only rule was that his penis could not go into my vagina. Other things could go into my vagina, and all sorts of things could go into my mouth, but him fucking me was off-limits. I don’t recall us discussing anal sex at all prior to our first meeting.
Our first meeting wasn’t planned. I was home alone late one night when I received an email from the guy. He requested my presence that night. They lived relatively close and he assured me that my cab fare would be covered. Usually it’s best to meet in public first to see if there’s chemistry, but I’d gotten a decent vibe from the guy via email and, well, I was horny and up for an adventure.
I got dressed and called a cab. I was a tad worried when I arrived at the address he had given me, since it was definitely not a house or apartment building. But there was a man waiting out front, and he paid the cabbie, so I assumed he was the guy. He was tall and blond with some facial hair.
He let me in their place, which had been converted from a less residential use. It was dimly lit but I could tell the place had some serious square footage. While San Francisco isn’t quite like Manhattan, real estate is definitely pricey, so a big place is unusual.
We walked to the back of the building where there was a living room area set up. I sat on the couch, which was facing a rather large television, which was not on, and a curtain. While I still sat on the couch he went through the curtain. I heard that he was talking, but not what he was saying. I figured he was talking to her, but wasn’t at all sure.
Eventually, he bid me behind the curtain. Beyond the curtain was a “bedroom.” The bedroom had a large office area with a very large, multi-winged desk. He and I sat at the desk while he said all the things we’d do to her. I heard not a peep from her, and began to wonder if “she” existed. But then I peeked over and sure enough, there was a woman bound spread-eagle to the bed.
We made our way over to the bed. He kept up a constant chatter about what was going on. After all, she couldn’t see so he had to keep her updated.
He directed me to do various things to her. I was fine; I follow direction well and I was having fun. I licked her pussy. I fingered her pussy. I sucked his cock. I watched him fuck her. I do so like watching couples fuck.
The whole time she made clear she was enjoying herself. She didn’t talk, but she did moan. He interpreted. He assured me that she liked what was going on. I, too, liked what was happening. We continued with our ministrations, focusing mostly on her pussy, as there it was open for us.
I did whatever he told me. I licked. I sucked. I fingered. Then he grabbed my wrist. He whispered in my ear that he wanted to fist her but that his hands were too big. He said my hands were just the right size.
I swear. True story.
[To be continued, of course.]
I would proudly wear this necklace, or this pin. The word cunt should not be a bad one. 
Actually, it’s silly that there are bad words at all. It’s the way it’s used that makes it bad, not the word itself. Words have connotations, and “cunt” has a negative one on Urban Dictionary. But I like it. Because it’s only one syllable with very short, clipped sounds it can sound harsh. And it can sound dirty. I like it.
